Post by feidreva on Aug 4, 2010 16:36:27 GMT 10
With the great help of Angel I tried to adapt and translate some funny stuff extracted from Shiva Rajah's dirty mind. It's a collection of tags found in different walls around Midgar.
I hope you'll like it.
(In the locker room of SOLDIER’s training room)
In the army, men are men!
Heidegger
The poor chocobos know it well…
Reno
(In the bathroom of the mess’ basement)
Here we eat shit!
Zack
Upstairs it’s even worse.
Angeal
Sephiroth sucks!
Cloud
When and where?
Anonymous
The answer is war!
Anonymous
Which proves how stupid the question was…
Reeve
More tags on this freshly painted wall? Are you about finished, you bunch of swines?
Hojo
This wall is re-open after work
Rufus
If you tag the wall as well, we will never see the end of it!
Hojo
Handsome man, strong, fearless, good job, looks for young woman to share sweet moments and more if affinity…
Rude (phone 32 21)
Rudo, this is the men’s bathroom, baka!
Reno
(In the bathroom of SOLDIER’s quarters)
Don’t look for humour on this wall… the joke of the day, you’ve got it in your hands!
Reno
Make love, not war
Aerith
You must be joking! Do both; get married…
Lucrecia
Nice, thanks!
Hojo
Sephiroth is a fuckhead!
Anonymous
Zack, I know it’s you! If I catch you, I’ll cut you into pieces!
Sephiroth
Shit, Seph, don’t be stupid. It was a joke!
Nero, I now you’re going to drink lik hell and you’ll inevitably come here and reed this. Don’t forget we bookt the training room tonite. Don’t waist your time in this fucking cafeteria.
Weiss
You have a nerve to right this in front off everybody! It’s allways you who is pushed for time!
Nero
Hey! Both of you! I’ve got a spare dictionary, are you interested?
Genesis
Speciality of this place: the waitress and the chocobo with lemon. I tried both, I prefer the chocobo.
Anonymous
I never tried with a chocobo…
Reno
(In the bathroom of ShinRa’s lab)
What if I had infected the toilet paper with a lethal virus, eh, bunch of disgusting taggers?
What would you use to wipe your arse?
Hojo
As usual: the hand towel.
Sephiroth
-IN CASE OF FIRE DON’T USE THE LIFT –
Use the fire extinguisher!
Vincent
In Hojo’s medical dictionary, next to the word “gonorrhea”, it’s written “see index”. I looked at my finger; it’s ok. I’ve got nothing.
Zack
Gaïa! And I’m supposed to make elite SOLDIERs with that…
Hojo
What’s nice with the missionary position is that one can continue to read one’s comic book.
Yazoo
Doggy style, it’s better. You don’t have to hold it!
Loz
If I see a comic book lying around in the bedroom again… ONLY ONE…!!!
Kadaj
Sephiroth for president!
Cloud
And Cloud for Queen!
Cid
(In a brand new lift in the TURK’s section)
Here is what I call a spotless lift. Not a scrape, not a tag, not a spot, nothing. Well done guys! Splendid!
Genesis
(In SOLDIER’s bathroom)
More than 5 jerks, it’s masturbation!
Reno
(Engraved on a tree trunk in the Forgotten Capital)
If you are the uber cute boy who fought here last night, with long silvery hair, emerald eyes, long black coat, tight leather pants and lovely rosy lips, I can’t sleep anymore!!! Where did you buy your gun? Answer here:………………………….
Vincent
(On the wall of Tifa’s bar)
One day my prince will come!
Jenova
You’ve been waiting a long time; he’s not going to like what he sees…
Lucrecia
What’s written on this bathroom’s wall is disgusting!
Hojo
Look in the mirror: it’s worse!
Weiss
Ladies, keep in mind that if it has wheels or testicles, you’ll have trouble with it sooner or later!
Cid
(On a brand new wall in one of ShinRa’s lab)
Not a tag, not a spot! I was looking for it, it’s: THE WALL OF SILENCE!
Lucrecia
Loz, you’re so dumb if a championchip of dumbness existed, you would be too dumb to win!
Cloud
And the championship of spelling, fuckhead? When do you sign up?
Loz
(In the ladies room of 7th Heaven)
WOMEN DON’T NEED MEN!
Elena
I must concede that here, we can manage more or less without them…
Rosso
(Note on the fridge, in the kitchen of Tifa’s bar)
Loz, I kept your meal in the blue bento box. I warn you that if you leave the vegetables one more time, you better have a more convincing excuse than “I don’t like them” or else you’d have to face me! You set a very bad example for the children.
Tifa
O.K. I don’t eat them because I’m a very emotional person! How can you stay unaffected by the dreadful shriek of the spinach immersed alive in a vegetablicidal saucepan? I refuse to be involved in this genocide! So I left the vegetables in the box…
Loz
(Engraved in the freshly painted cabin of Tiny Bronco)
Solitary pleasure, it’s economical: no need to treat your hand to dinner after!
Anonymous
Vince, I know you’re missing Lucrecia and you need to let off steam, but now it’s getting annoying…
Cid
(Engraved on the freshly painted wall of Hojo’s lab, under the following warning sign : )
-NO SCRIBLES, NO PAINT, NO SPRAY PAINT, NO BILLSTICKING ON THIS WALL-
Honestly, it never occurred to me!!!
Vincent
Damn! Who was the moron who bestowed this gauntlet to him?!
Hojo
If you discover who it is, let me know, too. I’d also like to have a word with him…
Cid
With my luck, I’ll surely get caught writing with a marker pen on this fuckin' wal_
Game over! Hojo: 1 – Reno: 0
Rude
When we were 8 years old, Tifa dreamt of dolls and I dreamt of SOLDIERs. Now, it’s me who dreams of dolls and her who dreams of SOLDIERs!!!!!
Cloud
So Loz can flirt with her?
Yazoo
Why?
Cloud
Bah, you’re not one, are you?
Yazoo
Neither Loz!
Cloud
Nope, but his is bigger!
Yazoo
Since when does he have a sword?
Cloud
Gaïa…I understand why you never made it to SOLDIER!
Yazoo
That's all folks! ;D
I hope you'll like it.
(In the locker room of SOLDIER’s training room)
In the army, men are men!
Heidegger
The poor chocobos know it well…
Reno
(In the bathroom of the mess’ basement)
Here we eat shit!
Zack
Upstairs it’s even worse.
Angeal
Sephiroth sucks!
Cloud
When and where?
Anonymous
The answer is war!
Anonymous
Which proves how stupid the question was…
Reeve
More tags on this freshly painted wall? Are you about finished, you bunch of swines?
Hojo
This wall is re-open after work
Rufus
If you tag the wall as well, we will never see the end of it!
Hojo
Handsome man, strong, fearless, good job, looks for young woman to share sweet moments and more if affinity…
Rude (phone 32 21)
Rudo, this is the men’s bathroom, baka!
Reno
(In the bathroom of SOLDIER’s quarters)
Don’t look for humour on this wall… the joke of the day, you’ve got it in your hands!
Reno
Make love, not war
Aerith
You must be joking! Do both; get married…
Lucrecia
Nice, thanks!
Hojo
Sephiroth is a fuckhead!
Anonymous
Zack, I know it’s you! If I catch you, I’ll cut you into pieces!
Sephiroth
Shit, Seph, don’t be stupid. It was a joke!
Nero, I now you’re going to drink lik hell and you’ll inevitably come here and reed this. Don’t forget we bookt the training room tonite. Don’t waist your time in this fucking cafeteria.
Weiss
You have a nerve to right this in front off everybody! It’s allways you who is pushed for time!
Nero
Hey! Both of you! I’ve got a spare dictionary, are you interested?
Genesis
Speciality of this place: the waitress and the chocobo with lemon. I tried both, I prefer the chocobo.
Anonymous
I never tried with a chocobo…
Reno
(In the bathroom of ShinRa’s lab)
What if I had infected the toilet paper with a lethal virus, eh, bunch of disgusting taggers?
What would you use to wipe your arse?
Hojo
As usual: the hand towel.
Sephiroth
-IN CASE OF FIRE DON’T USE THE LIFT –
Use the fire extinguisher!
Vincent
In Hojo’s medical dictionary, next to the word “gonorrhea”, it’s written “see index”. I looked at my finger; it’s ok. I’ve got nothing.
Zack
Gaïa! And I’m supposed to make elite SOLDIERs with that…
Hojo
What’s nice with the missionary position is that one can continue to read one’s comic book.
Yazoo
Doggy style, it’s better. You don’t have to hold it!
Loz
If I see a comic book lying around in the bedroom again… ONLY ONE…!!!
Kadaj
Sephiroth for president!
Cloud
And Cloud for Queen!
Cid
(In a brand new lift in the TURK’s section)
Here is what I call a spotless lift. Not a scrape, not a tag, not a spot, nothing. Well done guys! Splendid!
Genesis
(In SOLDIER’s bathroom)
More than 5 jerks, it’s masturbation!
Reno
(Engraved on a tree trunk in the Forgotten Capital)
If you are the uber cute boy who fought here last night, with long silvery hair, emerald eyes, long black coat, tight leather pants and lovely rosy lips, I can’t sleep anymore!!! Where did you buy your gun? Answer here:………………………….
Vincent
(On the wall of Tifa’s bar)
One day my prince will come!
Jenova
You’ve been waiting a long time; he’s not going to like what he sees…
Lucrecia
What’s written on this bathroom’s wall is disgusting!
Hojo
Look in the mirror: it’s worse!
Weiss
Ladies, keep in mind that if it has wheels or testicles, you’ll have trouble with it sooner or later!
Cid
(On a brand new wall in one of ShinRa’s lab)
Not a tag, not a spot! I was looking for it, it’s: THE WALL OF SILENCE!
Lucrecia
Loz, you’re so dumb if a championchip of dumbness existed, you would be too dumb to win!
Cloud
And the championship of spelling, fuckhead? When do you sign up?
Loz
(In the ladies room of 7th Heaven)
WOMEN DON’T NEED MEN!
Elena
I must concede that here, we can manage more or less without them…
Rosso
(Note on the fridge, in the kitchen of Tifa’s bar)
Loz, I kept your meal in the blue bento box. I warn you that if you leave the vegetables one more time, you better have a more convincing excuse than “I don’t like them” or else you’d have to face me! You set a very bad example for the children.
Tifa
O.K. I don’t eat them because I’m a very emotional person! How can you stay unaffected by the dreadful shriek of the spinach immersed alive in a vegetablicidal saucepan? I refuse to be involved in this genocide! So I left the vegetables in the box…
Loz
(Engraved in the freshly painted cabin of Tiny Bronco)
Solitary pleasure, it’s economical: no need to treat your hand to dinner after!
Anonymous
Vince, I know you’re missing Lucrecia and you need to let off steam, but now it’s getting annoying…
Cid
(Engraved on the freshly painted wall of Hojo’s lab, under the following warning sign : )
-NO SCRIBLES, NO PAINT, NO SPRAY PAINT, NO BILLSTICKING ON THIS WALL-
Honestly, it never occurred to me!!!
Vincent
Damn! Who was the moron who bestowed this gauntlet to him?!
Hojo
If you discover who it is, let me know, too. I’d also like to have a word with him…
Cid
With my luck, I’ll surely get caught writing with a marker pen on this fuckin' wal_
Game over! Hojo: 1 – Reno: 0
Rude
When we were 8 years old, Tifa dreamt of dolls and I dreamt of SOLDIERs. Now, it’s me who dreams of dolls and her who dreams of SOLDIERs!!!!!
Cloud
So Loz can flirt with her?
Yazoo
Why?
Cloud
Bah, you’re not one, are you?
Yazoo
Neither Loz!
Cloud
Nope, but his is bigger!
Yazoo
Since when does he have a sword?
Cloud
Gaïa…I understand why you never made it to SOLDIER!
Yazoo
That's all folks! ;D